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Movie Reviews
Christian Toto is an award-winning journalist and contributing film critic for The Washington Times. He runs WhatWouldTotoWatch.com and provides film reviews for The Dennis Miller Show, PajamasMedia.com and radio programs in D.C., Tampa and Topeka, Kansas.
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2008 was an unforgettable year, but it wont be soon enough to forget these movies. Here is our top ten list of the worst movies of 2008.
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Up in the Air
This searing drama follows an obese teen trying to make a better life for herself. It won't be easy, not with a sexually abusive father and monstrous momma (Mo'Nique in an Oscar-winning performance). "Precious" is terribly depressing and uplifting all at once, and the assured creative touches made by director Lee Daniels makes it a moving, must see feature.
Precious: Based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire
This searing drama follows an obese teen trying to make a better life for herself. It won't be easy, not with a sexually abusive father and monstrous momma (Mo'Nique in an Oscar-winning performance). "Precious" is terribly depressing and uplifting all at once, and the assured creative touches made by director Lee Daniels makes it a moving, must see feature.
Where the Wild Things Are
The classic children's tale is brought to life and expanded beyond its minimalist text. A rowdy young boy runs away and finds himself in a curious world where monstrous creatures roam the earth. The combination of old school puppetry and CGI is a wonder to behold, and the film manages to treat a children's story with surprising depth. But by the end you'll be able to tell the story was stretched beyond its breaking point.
2012
The latest disaster flick from director Roland Emmerich dovetails into Mayan mythology about the world ending in just two years. John Cusack leads a game cast through the CGI carnage, and while the crumbling earth is fun to watch for a while the story goes on way too long for its own good. Co-star Woody Harrelson livens the mood as a crackpot DJ, but the combination of a silly script and numbing special effects overwhelm the senses.
Everybody's Fine
Robert DeNiro turns in a terrific performance in this sentimental family drama. The "Raging Bull" star plays a muddled dad trying to reconnect with his four children. Each would prefer to keep their distance from papa for a variety of reasons, but he drops in on their lives all the same. The ending gets far too emotionally sticky for its own good, but DeNiro shows a more vulnerable side than we've ever seen from him.
Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant
Hollywood's attempt to capitalize on "Twilight" fever fails in this middling adventure based on the book series by Darren Shan. A teen stumbles into a war between vampire tribes, becoming undead himself in the process. The film is loaded with potentially fun ideas, and a game cast (Salma Hayek, John C. Reilly, Orlando Jones) does its best to unite the narrative threads. But the overwrought storyline just isn't satisfying.
Law Abiding Citizen
How can you mess up a vigilante movie? "Citizen" will show you how, what with its ridiculous story, detestable hero and complete lack of faith in the audience's collective IQ. Gerard Butler plays a man avenging the death of his wife and daughter from his jail cell. Jamie Foxx is the prosecutor trying to stop him from striking again. If only the movie could be stopped.
Couples Retreat
Those "Swingers" Jon Favreau and Vince Vaughn re-team for an island comedy that fails to repeat their movie chemistry. The pair play buddies who jet off to Bora Bora to help a fellow friend's marriage. Their vacation turns into a couples therapy course no one wants to attend. A few laughs can be found in an inert screenplay, but the stunning visuals might be just the trick for anyone currently snowbound.
A Serious Man
Even second-tier Coen brothers films are worth your attention. Here, the "Fargo" duo focus on an academic (Michael Stuhlbarg) experiencing a meltdown on multiple fronts - personal and professional. The film's sharp performances and stinging script will earn your admiration, but the Coens make it hard to embrace both the main character and others in his orbit.
The House of the Devil
Retro horror flick pays homage to genre movies from the early '80s. Only this film, about a woman who takes a gig watching over an old woman living in a spooky house, is better than its inspiration. "Devil" begins at a glacial pace, but stick with it for some finely crafted shocks.
Amelia
Two time Oscar winner Hilary Swank is the right choice to play the famed aviatrix. But this Amelia Earhart biopic skims the surface of a remarkable life, robbing us of the chance to get to know a game-changing personality. Richard Gere tries, in vain, to add juice to the tale playing Earhart's love interest. The sharply realized flying sequences represent the movie's best moments.
The Boys Are Back
Clive Owen reveals a more vulnerable side in this effective tear jerker, one inspired by a true story. Owen plays a newly widowed father trying to bond with his two children. The child actors more than carry their share of the film's emotional weight, and the film remains grounded without drifting into weepy monologues.
Michael Jackson's This is It
The late King of Pop is remembered through the rehearsals for what would have been his comeback tour. The material offers proof that Jackson could still bring it and cared deeply about every note he sang. The documentary steers clear of his outlandish behavior and odd appearance, offering a warm tribute to a gifted artist. Still, Jackson's quirkiness peeks through during the various dance numbers.
The Merry Gentleman
Michael Keaton steps behind the camera for the first time, and while the film didn't make a splash commercially it's still a sophisticated first effort. Keaton plays a hit man who forges a friendship with a woman (Kelly Macdonald) fleeing an abusive spouse. The film packs no big thrills or emotional pay offs, but it's a thoughtful piece all the same featuring sound performances from both Keaton and Macdonald.
Whiteout
The lovely Kate Beckinsale stars in this thriller set in one of the coldest climates on earth. She plays a detective trying to solve a murder at a remote outpost in Antarctica. "Whiteout" is generic through and through, but the unconventional setting gives the film an edge over its peers.
Halloween II
Director Rob Zombie's second "Halloween" is a marked improvement over his first try at reviving the franchise, but it's still only an average shocker. Michael Myers is back to slice and dice his way through his hometown in an odd attempt at family closure. The nifty sound effects and intense music provide a few jolts, but it's time to put this masked killer out to pasture.
In the Loop
The best anti-war comedy in quite some time and proof a film doesn't have to attack a specific war to make its point. This British comedy follows the fallout from a poorly advised soundbite on both British and American war fronts. It's almost too smart for its own good, but that's hardly a crime these days. Supporting player Peter Capaldi steals scene after scene as an incensed British media director.
The Invention of Lying
Ricky Gervais stars in this middling comedy about a world in which no one lies. Gervais' character, a portly single man, learns how to lie one day and everything in his life changes. The film's early sequences are the strongest, but the second half satirizes religion with mixed results. Jennifer Garner charms as the woman worth lying over.
The Final Destination
The fourth film in the horror franchise shreds such niceties as character and plot development to deliver some drab would-be scares. Once more a gaggle of pretty people avoid the Grim Reaper - but temporarily. The computer generated kills are mildly interesting, but everything else here is utterly forgettable. Let's hope this marks the final "Destination."
Post Grad
This bland drama follows a young woman (Alexis Bledel) who can't find the job of her dreams right after graduation. So she moves back home with her wacky parents and tries to regroup. Tweens will find Bledel's character appealing, but everyone else will wonder how she could be so blindingly naive about life post college. The film wastes a strong supporting troupe including Michael Keaton and Carol Burnett.
 
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